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Money Coaching Blog
Planning for Our Journey’s End  E-mail
Written by Deborah Price   
Wednesday, 11 January 2012 00:00

[Originally posted at Conscious Planet Radio -- Money Coaching Channel & Blog]

Recently a close friend died rather suddenly. Her family was very unprepared as, I believe, many of us are. So I’m going to discuss one of the most difficult subjects I’ve ever brought up. However, it may be one of the most important conversations we can ever have: preparing to die. I hope you will allow yourself this opportunity to consider these necessary steps for the sake of your well-being and as well as that of your loved ones.

None of us knows exactly how or when we will die, but we all know it will happen someday. I believe that we should try to approach death in the same manner that, hopefully, we approach life, intentionally and with an effort to do as much good and as little harm as possible. When it comes to exiting gracefully, it is best to plan for and embrace our eventual death as consciously as possible.

Here are some steps to help you to become clear about how you’d like to live the last days of your life:

1. Begin by writing out how you would want to live the final days of your life. Where would you like to be? Who would you like to be with you? What ceremonies or rituals would you like performed? What services or celebrations would you like held in honor of your life? (Personally, I want the party before I go and then a great roast at my funeral. And it had better be good or I’ll be back!)

2. Create an “End of Life” Journal and write out your thoughts and feelings about your life’s journey thus far. Inside, you might also write a letter to each of your loved ones. Express whatever you need them to know so that you can both be complete when you’re gone.

3. Discuss your final wishes in detail with your spouse, trusted friend, or family members. Ask for their support in allowing you to leave in the manner of your choosing.

4. If you don’t already have it, possibly consider long-term care insurance which can make an enormous difference if you have a prolonged illness.

5. Appoint someone who is emotionally willing and capable to be in charge of your personal, medical and financial affairs. Create a file with all of your insurance, legal and financial documents and review it in advance with your appointed agent. Make sure this person is fully capable of handling the responsibility of caring for your medical needs and financial affairs.

6. In order for your wishes to be carried out, it is important that you complete a living will and a state approved medical directive. Prepare these legal forms well in advance to avoid a crisis later. Without this, your family or appointed agent will not have the legal right to make decisions on your behalf.

7. Share your desire to have your loved ones fully support your wishes and not interfere with your medical directives, even if they disagree.

8. Discuss what you’d like to have happen as your illness progresses. Ask your loved ones and family to be your advocate if you cannot communicate for yourself.

9. Discuss your end-of-life wishes with your doctor and health care providers in detail. Have them explain your end-of-life choices and options thoroughly. Make sure you discuss your pain management options with them and give them a copy of your medical directive. Physicians are not required to follow directives if they disagree with your wishes, so it’s best to have a candid discussion with them and ask them if they plan to honor your directives.

10. Look into hospice options in your area. Hospice workers are highly trained end-of-life caregivers who are truly a gift to the dying and their loved ones during their final days.

11. You may want to request a loving prayer vigil to surround you in love and light during your transition. Death, like life, is a spiritual journey. Although we must all someday leave this earth, we must always remember that we wherever we go, we go with God. Know that as we leave this place and our human body, we are simply returning to the arms of the Beloved, and the ever-unfolding plan of our endless spiritual journey.

Peace and Blessings,

Deborah

Last Updated on Friday, 13 January 2012 22:11
 
Loving Your Family Means Making Wise Choices and Securing Their Future  E-mail
Written by Deborah Price   
Wednesday, 21 December 2011 00:00

On the night of my high school graduation, at the age of seventeen, my father died suddenly from a massive heart attack. He never made it to my graduation. He was only 50. Unfortunately, my father, who was a true Southerner,  had a deep love of all things fried and Camel cigarettes, without the filter.

With his passing, my mother became a young widow and single-parent of three overnight. All that he left her was a $10,000 life insurance policy, which my mother, who was very financially naïve, truly thought was a small fortune. My mother was raised by a single mother of seven herself during the Great Depression. My grandfather, whom I never knew, died in a flood and had left my mother’s  family destitute. He didn’t mean to do this, nor did my father. They were simply two decent men who didn’t think they’d die young, or plan for the possibility.

So, my mother had never seen a $10,000 check in her life. It took less than a year for her to realize that $10,000 was not much and that things were about to get financially challenging.  I’m sure my parents never imagined this tragedy and they were greatly unprepared. They were both hard workers but pretty much lived pay check to pay check. With only one income – and that of a waitress no less, my mother simply couldn’t make ends meet and money was a source of great and constant stress.

My parents never talked about planning for the future or what might happen if one of them died prematurely. They were good people and decent parents. However, they embodied what we refer to in Money Coaching as the classic Innocent Money Type. Some of the characteristics of the Innocent Money Type is:

  • Tendency to living in financial denial.
  • Fearful and anxious about money.
  • Repress their feelings and beliefs about money.
  • Financially naïve and dis-empowered.
  • Avoid talking about important financial issues.
  • Prefers someone else to manage the finances.
  • Easily taken advantage of financially.
  • Can be easily blindsided by unexpected financial issues.

My mother died six years ago. She never really recovered emotionally or financially from my father’s death. And when she died she had nothing to speak of materially, which I know bothered her a great deal. While this never bothered me, as a parent now myself, I know that every parent always hopes to leave a little something for their kids.

Having witnessed so much financial struggle in my parents lives, and later, those years with my mother alone, has deeply influenced my own life and choices.  I think part of the reason that I initially became a financial advisor and now a Money Coach was to learn how to be financially educated and empowered, and help others to do so, too. Ultimately, I realized that not only are we not taught all that we need to know to become financially successful, we also have emotional issues – patterns and beliefs about money that often unconsciously rule our money choices and behaviors.

Between the lack of financial education and our deeply entrenched family patterns, we are prone to repeating the same mistakes over and over again — from one generation to the next, like my mother and her mother before her. As a result of my experience,  I am deeply committed to seeing this painful legacy change. It’s why I founded the Money Coaching Institute and have worked diligently to pioneer of the field of Money Coaching.

My intention is to truly help people to heal their money story and to experience their personal and financial potential which is increasingly necessary to our individual and collective well-being and sustainability. Like no time before, we are being asked to become more financially mindful — to make more clear and conscious choices and, yes, to plan ahead for the day we might no longer be here. Losing a parent is hard enough…children do not need to feel the additional pain and stress of money issues and suffer major lifestyle changes along with losing their mother or father. Trust me on this one.

In order to do this we are called to move beyond the Innocent archetype.  One of the ways to do this, especially if you are a parent or in a financially interdependent relationship is to begin taking actions to ensure those you leave behind are taken care of.  Here are some things to begin to look into to make sure your loved ones will always be taken care of:

1. Life insurance – term or whole life insurance. Term is very cheap, depending on your age and health. At a minimum, if you can afford it, get enough to pay off the house and cover your income loss while you still have children at home or in college.

2. Long-term Care Insurance – buy it while you’re young enough to afford it so you’re spouse or children can afford to have you properly cared for in the event of a long-term illness. Policies with home health care options are the best to have.

3. A living will with a state approved medical directive so that your family can manage your care in the manner you wish in the event you are unable to communicate on your own behalf.

4. A proper will and/or trust so that your family can settle your estate properly without any legal issues.

5. Think about how the care and attention you put into caring for your family now, can allow them to live with your loving financial support long after your gone. This will allow them to remember you with love and gratitude rather than sadness or regret, for their entire lives.

What legacy do you desire to leave your spouse and children? Now…go make that happen!

Peace and Blessings,

Deborah

Last Updated on Wednesday, 21 December 2011 21:19
 
Releasing the Past: The First Step to Rebuilding  E-mail
Written by Deborah Price   
Wednesday, 07 December 2011 00:00

When it comes to money, almost everyone has a story lately. Unfortunately, many of the stories I’m hearing these days are filled with hard times, bad luck, loss, sadness, anger and resentment. Don’t get me wrong, I know that these stories are real and that there is pain and hardship associated with them….which I have deep compassion for.But as a Money Coach, I know all too well the dangers of becoming trapped in your story and the potentially disabling effect that it can have on your life. I know that many of you have been deeply impacted by this financial crisis and recession, but I want you to know that your financial circumstances are not who you are, so please…don’t become identified with them personally.

It is essential that you process your story (i.e. what happened to you) quickly so that you can move it outside of your being before it has a chance to take permanent residence. You must find a way to forgive and release what has happened, whether it was the loss of your home, your job, or your investments. Let it be done so that you can be free to move forward into the future and to creating the life you do want.

When we fail to release the past, we simply carry it with us everywhere. Over time, we can begin to identify with our story and the past so closely that we miss out on the present and the future simply becomes a repeat performance of yesterday. This is called an “unconscious self-fulfilling prophecy” and it is impossible to win at life when we are trapped inside this vicious cycle. The next phase of your life is actually waiting for you now. But you are only free to claim it when you willing to release the past, and to forgive yourself and others.

People ask me all the time to share my story with them and I always respond the same way. I tell them that my story is no longer real or very interesting to me. Telling it feels more like a fictional tale that I occasionally entertain myself with. It amuses, but doesn’t truly interest me. However, if you ask me to share with you something about my life today and my vision for the future…now that’s a story I’m excited to share.

What has happened to you and to most of us, in this economic meltdown is real, but it isn’t who you are. Unless of course, you let it be by not learning from the experience and letting it go. Resist the temptation of becoming a “victim” of your circumstances and story. Instead, I challenge you to become the “victorious” hero or heroine in your own “Divine Drama” (or comedy, if you choose!) We can begin to do this by taking inventory of all that we still have and all that we’ve have gained, in spite our losses. Sometimes, it is necessary to lose everything in order to regain everything and to rebuild from a place of balance and gratitude for what really matters. You have it within you to begin again. I invite you to begin writing the next chapter of your “Divine Drama” today.

Peace & Blessings,

Deborah

Last Updated on Wednesday, 07 December 2011 20:58
 
Dealing with Our Money Disorders  E-mail
Written by Deborah Price   
Thursday, 29 April 2010 00:00
Lately, it seems as though our national list of "money disorders" is growing by the day. Common money issues Americans face today include compulsive shopping, financial infidelity, hoarding, debt addiction, hoarding, compulsive gambling, corporate fraud and embezzlement ...what's next? How can we begin to heal our collective money shadow?

Perhaps it's time for a little money therapy. If we have a plumbing problem, we don't hesitate to call a plumber. If we have a health problem, we go see the doctor. If we have money issues, we also deserve the help and advice of a professional, too.

Money affects every aspect of our lives, and yet we know very little about our personal relationship to it.

HELLO!!! Isn't it time to heal our relationship with money?

This is what I know as a Money Coach: Whatever unhealed emotional wounds we carry inside of us, grow and become increasingly harmful to our inner and outer lives. Our shadow around money is not unlike cancer, left undetected or unmanaged will lie dormant for only so long. Eventually, it will manifest into a full blown problem -- an unavoidable problem or "disorder" that can wreak havoc on our lives and the lives of those around us. In some cases, a nation or the world. Witness the worldwide recession created by shadow aspects of a handful of corporate tyrants.

As we individually become more aware of our own money patterns and behaviors, we can begin to make new, healthier choices. In doing this, one by one, we can begin to shift the consciousness of money on the planet. We can and must create a new financial legacy for ourselves and our children. A legacy built on self-awareness, knowledge and empowerment rather than stress, fear, mistrust, oppression or greed.

To do this, we must each begin to understand and heal our own shadow and relationship with money. Self-awareness is the first step.

What is money and what does it really mean to you? I believe money is a powerful energy force and medium of exchange. It is a tool and resource that I receive as a direct result of the actions and contributions that I put forth in the world. It flows in and out of my life in direct relationship to my efforts, intentions and consciousness. Whenever I feel fearful or anxious about money, I spend time in prayer and meditate on what inside me needs attending to and address those needs proactively.

What does money mean to you? How does it influence, positively or negatively, your quality of life?  I'd love to hear your thoughts. You can email me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

Last Updated on Thursday, 29 April 2010 17:06
 
Blessings and Opportunities Disguised as Financial Set-backs  E-mail
Written by Deborah Price   
Wednesday, 31 March 2010 00:00
Lately, I've been reminded of how very grateful I am for the work I have been blessed with and how often, as many of you said, when one door closed in my life, another door opened. Sometimes we can be so focused on the losses and setbacks in our lives, that we forget to look for the opportunities and blessings that may be waiting for us. Because the truth is, everything we lose creates an opening for something new to come into our lives. We must always remain open and receptive to receiving the good that is available to us, which is why it's so important to stay positive and proactive on our own behalf.

I have had many losses in my life that I now have immense gratitude for. Whatever pain I may have suffered in the loss was small compared to the blessings and new opportunities that followed. In hindsight, I know now that anything I have ever lost, I no longer needed and that as long as I held on to my faith, I have always been given everything I did need instead. So, while it may be difficult, sometimes the only thing we can do is to surrender to what is happening, bless the experience and stay open to receiving our higher good.

Today, I ask you to consider being grateful for this time in your life as an opportunity to receive some new blessing or opportunity, whether that is the opportunity to explore some new horizon, the chance to dusk off your dreams, build a new life, the gift of change, or the opportunity to grow into more of who you always wanted to be. Sometimes, when life hands us lemons, we are simply being guided to the lemonade stand!

I think Ralph Waldo Emerson said it best:

Write it on your heart
that every day is the best day in the year.
He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.
Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.
Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;
begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit
to be cumbered with your old nonsense.
This new day is too dear,
with its hopes and invitations,
to waste a moment on the yesterdays.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
Last Updated on Wednesday, 31 March 2010 23:23
 
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